Archive for the ‘Steelers’ Category

The Only Hope for a Unified Ireland: Your Pittsburgh Steelers

March 17, 2009

Ok, maybe that’s a little much. But it was announced today that President Obama selected Steelers owner Dan Rooney as the new U.S. Ambassador to Ireland. He will be replacing the McManus brothers from Boondock Saints.

And as the N pointed out to me, this story culminates in the two things that define your humble editor (other than Virginia Tech and his overall awesomeness): being Irish and the Steelers.

Obviously, I am in total support of this. Mr. Rooney has been able to garner unabashed support from one group of sport loving drunks, so why not another?

There is still no word on the rumor that Steely McBeam will be his bodyguard.
What this announcement really tells us is that this is the greatest week ever. Selection Sunday, St. Patrick’s Day, four days of basketball watching and bracket shredding, and now this. (Admittedly, the last really only pertains to Steeler fans.)

So rejoice, and raise a glass tonight to the man who will represent us to the greatest country in the world.
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Jeff Reed fights paper towel dispenser… and loses.

February 18, 2009

NEW ALEXANDRIA, Pa. – Two-time Super Bowl champion Jeff Reed faces criminal charges this weekend after an alleged incident in Westmoreland County.

Reed, 29, one of the most effective field goal kickers in the NFL, was charged with disorderly conduct and criminal mischief shortly before 3 a.m. Saturday.

According to a state police press release, Reed damaged a towel dispenser inside the men’s room at a Sheetz gas station on Route 22 in New Alexandria after he became infuriated that it did not contain towels.

Store employees told state police that they heard Reed “banging on something and that it was really loud.” The employees said Reed then left the bathroom “using profane language in a loud manner” and stating that there were no towels in the restroom.

So I’m going to ask the obvious question here: What the hell is a super bowl winning kicker doing at Sheetz in New Alexandria, PA at 3 in the morning? I mean we all know that sheetz is a wonderful third option to Taco Bell and Sonic when you’re drunk, but his team just won the super bowl. He can afford better midnight snacks than college students.

Though in his defense, he was pissed at the paper towel dispenser for not having towels. I mean that the dispenser’s only job. Hold towels. It didn’t do it’s job. I’m sure the manager had a talk with the dispenser and told it that it was slacking off at it’s job and that if it didn’t work hard, there are many other paper towel dispensers that can take it’s place.

Gotta love the frosted tips, too. Nothing but the classiest in Pittsburgh.

Well, if we’re going to use pictures as evidence…

February 5, 2009
I mean, why not go with this one Mr. Northerner? He’s clearly out of bounds here.

I googled pictures of sour grapes, but I kept getting Patriot and UVA photos.

If I was a girl how would I pick the winner of Sunday’s Games?

January 15, 2009

MASCOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Mascot is any person, animal, or object that is thought to bring luck (your lucky beer cup is your own personal mascot). This also includes anything used to represent a group with a common identity.

We need something that says we’re gay, and Republican.

During a game, have you ever noticed how excited your female companions get when they notice the mascot on the field? Of course, this pales in comparison to the mascot being close enough to touch said female. The point of all of this is to pick the games this Sunday solely based on the best/cutest/less repulsive mascot.

First we will start with the NFC game.

Eagles Vs Cardinals (PS girls I am not putting an @ symbol because you should know by now that the second team listed is always the away team wether it in text or on TV)

Swoop Vs Big Red

First of all the Cardinals Mascot is Big Red. It’s a chewing gum, not a mascot. It doesn’t instill fear. However, Big Red might be cuter and less menacing looking than swoop and he is red. Chicks dig red more than green and black. So, I think the edge has to go to the Cardinal looking thing here.

The AFC Game

Ravens Vs Steelers(still no @ symbol live it learn it love it)


Poe Vs Steely McBeam


So, does anyone else think that Poe the Raven is compensating for something with that large nose? I do. Also, doesn’t Steely Mcbeam look like the union construction worker from the Village People? Now, the choice is between a large beaked bird or a construction worker that may or may not prefer the company of men.

Chicks dig a manly man and if he may be gay that just means hes easier to talk too and a good listener. So, the nod goes to Steely and the Steelers. Of course, good things always seem to be taken a step too far…

Myron Cope on Sports

February 29, 2008
As most of you know, some of us (me) here at The North End Zone are die-hard Steelers fans. This past week, we lost long time broadcaster and Pittsburgh fan Myron Cope. One of my earliest memories of Myron was when I was about 8 or 9 and asked my dad whether Myron would have been on the radio in any other city. The answer, obviously, is “no”.

But it wasn’t just the fact that the city had come to love a broadcaster who had a voice made for writing. It was that Myron was the city. A hard worker with nothing given to him. A fixation on Pittsburgh sports that a therapist would drool over (you know, if a Pittsburgher ever actually went to a therapist).

But he was more than just a celebrity. Myron invented the Terrible Towel, the rights to which he gave to a Pittsburgh area autistic research center. All the profits from sales of Terrible Towel’s go towards helping cure autism, a disease Myron’s son has struggled with for decades. Myron would have been the same man if he had been working in a steel mill for the past 40 years instead of in the broadcast booth.

Myron represented the more-than-just-a-game attitude most Steelers fans take. Is it the end of the world when the Steelers lose a tough game? Of course not. But sometimes you feel so bad about a loss that you feel bad for feeling so bad. Myron not only broadcast all the highs and lows of the Steelers’ past decades, he lived them and felt them with us.

Myron’s passing falls five years to the day after the passing of another Pittsburgh icon, Fred Rogers. Two men who, like our teams, are guys that you root for. We’ll miss you Myron.

The Bill Cowher Power Hour

January 5, 2007


The reason why Bill Cowher left was not to spend time with his family it was to spend working on his new talk radio show. If anyone who has ever seen the NFL Channel TV commercial from last year would know what I am talking about. The talk show in the commercial was called the Bill Cowher Power Hour. “Where the Chin will always Win.”

Now the show is brilliant, if Rachel Ray can get a show why isn’t it brilliant. It would be him talking to celebrities and giving tips about football to youngsters throughout the show. And once a year there would be a “Battle of the Chins” where Bill and Jay Leno face off in a series of events to see who is king of the talk show chins. The events would be spitting, walking in some sort of J pattern, and so forth. I think this is a golden idea no pressure of coaching but yet more fame then before. I can’t wait.