Archive for the ‘NBA playoffs’ Category

Weekend Recap: WOOOOOOO Version

June 15, 2009

The N allowed a special exemption to have your humble editor to jump on the weekend recap. I apologize for the delay, but I doubt any letters will reach our inbox. (If you feel like writing, please use as many curse words as possible, and write in all caps.)

Onto this weekend, not that anything special happened. Except for…

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Yes, my beloved Penguins did what many deemed impossible. Sidney, Geno, and everyone else FINALLY got that Stanley Cup they’ve waited 5 years to hoist. There will clearly be a more substantial post on the accomplishment at a later time. But I don’t see how anyone that watched the last period can possibly say they can’t get into hockey. I know it was my team and all, but good lord. A crossbar to keep the lead in game 7 with 2 minutes left? Dead people had heart attacks watching that. And Hossa? You know I kinda feel ba… BAAAAAAAAH. His tears sustain me. Again, much, much more to come.

Another Championship. There was some sort of basketball contest or something this weekend too. We know we give the NBA a pretty big snub here, but we can say succinctly that we hate the Lakers. Thus, this series gets a big “whatevs” from us. Maybe if Penny Hardaway was still on the Magic, we would have paid attention. But those 4th quarters were unbearable. I’ve seen less timeouts at a daycare.

The final nail in the coffin for Detroit. Bill Laimbeer resigns as coach of WNBA’s Detroit Shock. Adjust your WNBA Fantasy Coach lineup accordingly.

Less important news than the WNBA… The Plaxico hearing has been delayed until September, which likely means he will not be playing football this season. The real lesson here is simple kids: buy a freaking holster, right? We’re not sure how this affects the Giants as a football team, but boy is Tom Coughlin’s face red ba-dum-ching. They’ll still beat the Redskins, have no fear.


To be honest, that’s all I could find while at work today. It seemed to be a slow sports weekend other than the two championships. It may also be because I just woke up from Friday night. Anyone seen my pants?


June 9, 2009

Let’s look at the lineup for tonight:

  • NBA Finals game 3
  • Stanley Cup Final Game Game 6
  • Phillies v. Mets
  • Yankees v. Red Sox

If you don’t have your popcorn ready tonight, I’m sending TO after you.

It seems like the sports gods have decided that today is a good day to make television into a sports clusterf@*k. And it doesn’t really get any calmer until next week. Needless to say there will be more bball, and the Stanley Cup could go to a Game 7, but the main draw is that after the Yankees/Red Sox and Phils/Mets series we do a little switcheroo and we have a subway series going down in the Bronx as well as what some are saying could be a World Series preview between the Phightin’s and the Sox.

So pick something to watch tonight, because there will be a quiz tomorrow. If you want to see some (fingers crossed) magic, watch the best rivalry in sports, because my boy Beckett is on the hill, and he means business.

Weekend recap

June 1, 2009

I spent the entire day in the city yesterday hanging out and drinking, so, needless to say, I’m effing exhausted and want to just go lay in bed all day today. But since I need a paycheck, here I am. Let’s get this over with ASAP.

1. The Penguins are sucking it hard with two losses to the Red Wings. Detroit now leads the series 2-0 and the penguins are left with a hope and a prayer. Crosby has been frustrated, both sexually and hockey-wise by the Red Wings, and he doesn’t know what to do. CGally has also been frustrated sexually and hockey-wise, but unlike Crosby, there is absolutely no chance that CGally is going to find his way out of the frustration anytime soon. Crosby at least has four games left.

2. The Magic have upended the Cavs to move onto the NBA Finals. Finally, there will be an end to all this LeBron/Kobe shit going on everywhere as well as the puppet nonsense on ESPN. Glad to see that the stupid analysts are so on top of things that they saw the Magic coming from the first round and predicted this upset as well as the last one against the Celtics. Oh wait, they didn’t because they are pretty much all former players who don’t belong in the booth. My b.

3. Rafael Nadal got ousted from the French Open for, like, the first time in the history of the French Open. Looks like this was the weekend for upsets.

4. Florida State played THE Ohio State University on Sunday in baseball. The final score was 37-6. The Seminoles were leading 35-0 in the fifth inning, and I think it’s safe to say that the Buckeyes won a moral victory by winning the last four innings 6-2. Too bad moral victories don’t mean jack squat, but hey, they take what they can get. Looks like the ACC is a powerhouse in another sport. Add that to… well we’re pretty good at football and basketball still. Powerhouse is an overrated term. On another note, BC lost 3-2 to Texas. What’s so special about that? The game lasted 25 innings. Two innings short of a three game series.

5. David Ortiz has been dropped down to 6th in the lineup for the first time since 2005. This has still not been helping him with his bat and at this point, a trip to the DL looks imminent if he can’t figure his shit out. Not really news that happened over the weekend, but I need an outlet.

6. In a display of pure athleticism, Janet (the Fiancee) finished her work for her Montessori teaching certificate this weekend and presented her projects like a champ on Sunday. She was dropping the competition like flies and is finally done with this damn class which sent her to Manhattan two Sundays a month at 6AM for the last year. In case you haven’t put two and two together, this is why we were drinking in the city yesterday. We went to Heidelberg on the upper east side, and if you ever make a trip to the City, I suggest you go there and get “Das Boot”. It’s real, the bubble actually does exist, and it’s a lot of beer. It’s totally worth it, too.

Reason #4,398 why I hate basketball

May 11, 2009

Orlando Magic fan Ernest Provetti is demanding an apology from Glen “Big Baby” Davis after the Boston Celtics player came into contact with Provetti’s son at the end of Saturday’s Game 4, the Orlando Sentinel reported Monday.

At the end of regulation, Davis hit a game-winning buzzer-beater and in his excitement collided with the young fan.

Provetti said Davis shoved his 12-year-old son Nicholas with such force after the game-winning jumper that Nicholas’ baseball cap was knocked into the air and the boy dove into his courtside seat.

Provetti sent an e-mail to the NBA League office Monday morning. In it he said Davis acted like a “raging animal with no regard for fans’ personal safety.”

He said in a later interview with the Orlando Sentinel, “The NBA makes it clear to not cross the sideline. If I cross that line, the NBA will take away my tickets. It’s a double standard.”

Where to start, where to start? How about you stop effing whining about your son getting bodychecked by a PROFESSIONAL BASKETBALL PLAYER IMMEDIATLY AFTER HE HIT THE GAME WINNING SHOT IN THE PLAYOFFS. Yeah, that seems like a good place to start. If you want to bring your child to a game where you are literally three feet away from the court at any time, you’re going to have to use some common sense and assume that you might be involved in a human collision at some point in the game.

Plus the kid was literally toeing the line of the court and that doesn’t give the players too much leeway.

That BS about it being a double standard can also stop. The players don’t come and watch you. You watch them. It’s not a mutual thing. They couldn’t care less if you were there. So they can basically do whatever the hell they want short of running into the stands and serving up a beatdown a la Ron Artest.

This is just another way of this guy trying to get his fifteen minutes of fame by capitalizing on his kid getting his ass handed to him on national TV. Ten bucks says that if the Magic had won and Dwight Howard railed his kid, the guy wouldn’t even utter a peep. That would only get covered in Orlando papers. But since the Celtics were the culprits, this guy is complaining to whoever will lend him an ear up and down the Eastern Seaboard.

And the media outlet who wrote this story and quit it with the dramatic “baseball cap flew off his head as he dove into his seat” crap. The kid is what? 4’8″? 112 pounds? Big Baby is 6’9″ and 289 pounds. I would say that’s a bit of a mismatch. Davis could bump into Ralph Friedgen and knock him on his ass. Plus the kid stayed on his feet the entire time. Must not have been a hard push, huh smart reporter person?

Plus the kid probably deserved it. Have you ever met a 12-year old who didn’t piss you off? I haven’t. Basketball fans suck.