Archive for the ‘Johnny Damon’ Category

BREAKING NEWS: Sabathia is fat.

February 23, 2009

It looks like a $160 million isn’t enough to get a gym membership in New York these days. Either that or CC is with-child. It could really go either way on this one.

Though, to his advantage, I think it’s safe to say that Sabathia is not taking steroids. That makes at least one Yankee clean. Yay progress!

Oh, and now Johnny Damon and Xavier Nady are poor. A single tear rolls down my cheek.

He can’t afford a shirt, shoes or a shave. Poor guy.

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Johnny Damon is an idiot

February 18, 2009

TAMPA, FL. – “Yeah he did some bad things. He took a steroid. Definitely do not condone that, at all, but there could be a lot worse things he could have been doing out there. He hasn’t done a crime. So there’s worse things that he could have done but you know I’ve known Alex since he was 15 and he’s always been super nice to me and so I’m going to support him and try help him through this time. (Reporter: Johnny, what would have been worse?) Murdering someone… There’s plenty of things that could be worse than what he did.”

This is the actual quote from Johnny Damon. I’m speechless. Except for this: Looks like Jesus, acts like Judas, throws like Mary.