Archive for the ‘James Bond owns your soul’ Category

Basketball Game #25: UVA

February 18, 2009
In between all of the swearing and remote throwing, we haven’t really put anything up about Tech basketball this year. We know. It’s on us. We’ve disappeared like Jeff Allen on offense.

But now the boys need our help. We seem to be squarely on the bubble going into a must win tonight at UVA. And good lord do we love beating UVA.

Anyone else remember chants of “Wait until basketball season” every time we beat them in football? So do we.

We know the hero will help us out. It always does. We also know that the team reads our site. The aforementioned Mr. Allen is shown here doing his best impression of our wave to our dispatched football opponents:


As for our hero, we have to go with what works. After sifting through the 30 baseball posts by The Northerner, we found our man that took down the Cavaliers during the fall:


Game 12: We go to the ACC Championship, UVA stays home for bowl season

November 28, 2008
Soooooo…. that just happened. 7 points on offense against Duke. It’s a damn good thing Macho scored on that interception, as we would have no doubt turned the ball over again.

We turned the ball over more than… some sort of… turnover machine or something. Which is retty much what our offense has become.

Seriously, that was freaking embarrassing. There’s no 2 ways about it.

Though, it was just about perfect.

Not only did we get the win, but the offense was so obviously terrible that Voldemort cannot hide behind the victory.

At the very least, a wide receiver scored a touchdown… ELEVEN GAMES INTO THE SEASON. Wish that was a joke.

Bu we won’t dwell on it. Drinking started at 1:30 and ended at 1:30, so the day was quite awesome. Despite the fact that Blacksburg somehow relocated to Siberia at game time.

We’d rant more, but the turkey is calling.

But we won, and we find that any reason to post this picture is worth it.


So this is the week. UVA week. God, we hate UVA. There’s no two ways to say it. They are just awful. Everything about them.

Their fight song is the New Year’s song. Come on. Be original one time.

They are also the victims of the greatest non-douchebag prank ever.

So not only can we lock up a spot in the title game, but we also give the Whos their 7th loss. As much as we enjoy seeing them play on the blue turf, spending more time on that campus is also a pretty bad punishment.

Thanks to the holiday, we are phoning this preview in.

What should you look for in this game? Nothing. This may be the ugliest game you will watch all year. They will probably use this game to torture Guantanimo Bay inmates.

But root your heart out. We may just back our way into another ACC Championship game.



Let’s hit up some predictions.

Last week’s winner is the always impressive Geoff Way. He’s impressive because we’re not sure anyone else could stay in college for as long as he has and not be the son of a billionaire.

So here’s an image of another guy we thought would never graduate.

Only going to Duke saved him from being punched in the face on campus.



Let’s jump into the picks this week:

C Gally: 15 – 13 VT, one safety

G Way: 21 – 10 VT

Wright: 20 – 14 VT

Lady Wright: 21 – 7 VT

CMU Football Analyst: 29 – 16 UVA (hope you liked your time with us, Mr. Analyst)

The Bull: 17 – 14 VT

Meet Bag: 27 – 17 VT

B Dubs: 10 – 0 VT, pick 6

The D-i-P: 13- 10 VT

African Ambassador (now in Philly, much more dangerous): 16 – 6 VT, no offensive touchdowns

Newcomer Bobby P: 17 – 6 VT, one defensive touchdown

Papa Gally: 28 – 7 VT, 3bks

We go back to our old friend, UVA graduate school alum, prior predictor, and overall turd sandwich BK to give us a prediction of 14 – 10 Hokies. He claims that the first five minutes of Role Models will be more entertaining than the entire game. Not having seen the movie, we can’t say we disagree.

Good luck to everyone. I’m pretty sure I’m winning this week.


Father Karras rocked the house last week. Not his fault Voldemort can’t get the offense to read above a 10th grade level.

And we hate UVA. I mean, everything about them. We can go on and on about Zima and pretty drinks and all that. But we’re better than that.

We could make our hero some kind of non-Smirnoff Ice beverage. But that’s just two easy.

This is too important. We need to make it happen.

Where do we go?

We go with someone that gets things done, even if it’s not conventional. Sound familiar?

You guessed it.

James Bond from Casino Royale.

Bad. Ass.