Archive for the ‘Giggity’ Category

Game 10: Miami Hurricanes both suck and blow

November 13, 2008
Even though we technically gave our Maryland recap, we will admit it was maybe a little concise. Even for our standards. So here goes.

In a word:

Once again, it is confirmed that there is NOTHING like a Thursday night in Blacksburg. The atmosphere was electric. It was amazing to watch. Well done, Hokie Nation.

So what went so right this game? Plainly put, our offense had to use a different game plan than our usual suck.

We were changing things up. Using different formations. It was a thing of beauty.

Granted, we still only scored 23 points, but with this offense, that’s something to write home about.

And Evans? Pssh, straight rolling. Dude is trucking people like it’s his job. In the words of Rube Baker, “You’re on the tracks and the train’s coming through, butthead.”

His shimmy makes girls in Blacksburg go wild.

We’ve already covered Boone extensively. We’re pretty sure he’s the best QB we’ve had under center since….

We could be about the 37th person to call the crazy formation the Wild Turkey and suggest you take a shot of the namesake whenever you see it used. But if you think this will make you forget how bad the offense looks, well you’d probably be correct.

Glennon played ok, WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT HE NEEDS TO DO. Just don’t screw it up man, that’s all we ask. We’re not asking you to save the world. We have Al Gore for that.

The defense was stellar again. 13 points. We’ll take it every time. Sorry your back is hurting, Coach Foster. It’s quite a heavy load Mr. Stinespring heaps upon you.

A few more dumb penalties than we’d like to see, but we fought through.

So until next time Maryland, take care. We’ll be back to beat you in basketball soon enough.

We’re better than you in both.

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So on to this week.

We know Miami is down and everything, but good lord, we still hate them with the fire of 1,000 suns.

Every player. Every coach. Every fan. Everyone ever involved in the program. Nothing but hate for ya’ll

And this game could not be bigger. This is the key to the Coastal Division. We win, we still have to win our last two. But if we lose? It’s over folks. Say hello to a bowl somewhere between the Gator Bowl, Chick-fil-a Bowl, or some dot-com bowl.

This team is a little like us. Same record. Same bad losses. Same decent wins. They are just much more douchey.

Expect a close, hard hitting game with many ups and downs. We’re kind of awful on the road this year, so prepare to be frustrated. The best cure for that would be a better offense, but a more practical cure is more alcohol.

At least two players have a history together. It seems that Cam Chancellor and Miami QB Robert Marve used to play peewee’s together. Marve was a kick returner back then. We have uncovered the exclusive video.

Oh, then there was this:

Best. Picture. Ever.

Nothing but hate.

GO HOKIES!!!

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Let’s hit up those crazy predictions.


Last week resulted in a tie between The Bull and The Northerner, both only off by 4 points. They mud wrestled to break the tie, and everyone watching lost.

To celebrate the victory over the turtles, you’re trophy is a copy of the original NES Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles video game.

Speaking of blowing…

We don’t care who gets to keep it. You’ll both die as soon as you get to the water level anyways.

Harder than Intermediate Accounting.

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Now let’s hit up this week:

C Gally: 22 – 19 VT (Does any one else notice how terrible I am at this?)

The Northerner: 24 – 13 VT

The Bull: 20 – 14 VT

CMU Football Analyst: 23 – 14 VT while really stretching to say it will be a boring game.

Wright: 21 – 20 VT

Lady Wright: 21 – 10 VT

B-Dubs: 24 – 14 VT

G Way: 20 – 13 VT

The DiP: 23 – 17 VT

Maniak: 24 – 13 VT

Poppa Gally: 27 – 6 VT, and you know the drill. If Tech blocks 3 kicks, the bar is drinking on me.

And our guest visitor for this week is Maniak’s Miami alumni boss. Without knowing anything about him, we have already established the hate. However, his very honest prediction of 20 – 10 VT does show some promise.

Good luck to everyone named C Gally.

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Did anyone not think Bullitt was going to come through for us? Hell no. We don’t even know why they play the game. It was over when we clicked “Post”.

And once again, the game gets bigger. But where do we go from here?

We go back to the reason your humble editor attended Virginia Tech. 1999 Miami game. After going down 10 – 0, Tech rattled off 43 straight points and went on to an undefeated season. It was a night game. I was a sophomore in high school and knew where I was going to college. It was a good feeling.

And who from that team is the greatest football player to ever set foot on Worsham Field?

You guessed it.

Corey Moore

The guy defines Hokie football. He also loves beating Miami. His first names is not only awesome, but spelled correctly.

LET GO HOKIES!!!!

Cartoon Madness – Elite 8

April 8, 2008

TURTLES GET SHELL SHOCKED, FOX CONTINUES TO REPRESENT

(link to new survey: https://survey.vt.edu/survey/entry.jsp?id=1207662168619)

Go figure that Shredder would be the one surviving character from TMNT to move on to the Elite 8. 3 of the 4 turtles made it to the Sweet 16, and all lost, although Michelangelo nearly pulled off a big upset over Max Power. Peter knocked off Raphael and Cartman withstood Leonardo. As predicted by yours truly, the Doug Funnie – Ralph Wiggum battle would be fierce, and when the dust cleared, Bluffington’s finest advanced with a 12-10 win. Finally, Optimus may have proved that this is his tourney to win, pounding The Man With No Name 19-3. With that being said, however, FOX still gets 4 reps into the round of 8.
So we get to the regional finals, with the winners advancing to the Final Four. These should be some pretty sweet matchups, especially Peter vs. Doug. I’d LOVE to see a cartoon episode with these two in the same room, one imagining he’s fighting villains as Quailman, the other reminiscing about the time he went through that Daisy Duke phase (Come here you basketball!).
So below are the matchups. Continue to vote and spread the word. Watch a little baseball too if you have time, or the women’s final four if you’ve chosen that life path.

PETORIA REGIONAL FINAL
#1 Peter Griffin
vs. #2 Doug Funnie

MAX POWER REGIONAL FINAL
#1 Homer Simpson
vs. #7 Pinky and the Brain

A.W.E.S.O.M.E.-O REGIONAL FINAL
#1 Eric Cartman

vs. #3 Glenn Quagmire

SHEERA’S PIECE REGIONAL FINAL
#2 Optimus Prime

vs. #8 Shredder

(again, the link to the new survey: https://survey.vt.edu/survey/entry.jsp?id=1207662168619)

Cartoon Madnees – Sweet 16

March 31, 2008

Before we get into the Sweet 16 matchups, let’s take a look at the second round results:




Quagmire and Optimus with the largest crushings of the round. Below is Steve’s wrap-up of the event. The link for the next round is: https://survey.vt.edu/survey/entry.jsp?id=1206985627599

Seriously, this is the most professionally thing we’ve ever done. What with the surveys and all…

FOX All-Stars vs. Heroes in a Halfshell

We’re now at the Sweet 16. In the Round of 32, we had two tough tiebreakers that had to be decided by the little sister. Based on her apparent love for talking mice and the liking of the name “Zapp”, the mice duo and the man with no name advance to the Sweet 16. Raphael, representing the Big Red Blob from Western Kentucky, also advanced as a 12 seed with an impressive win over Philip Fry, as did Leonardo and Michelangelo. Go figure my favorite turtle was the first one to go down.

The tournament continues to be the FOX Invitational, as Homer, Peter, Zapp, little Ralphie, and Captain Syphilis all moved on. Finally, He-man, who survived a scare from a 16 seed, fell to Shredder, who has now basically renamed the region the Technodrome Region.

So now we reach the regional semis, where the voting choices become even tougher, especially for the Doug Funnie vs. Ralph Wiggum showdown. So, below are the matchups that will determine who moves on, and who goes back into your television set.

Petoria Region

#1 Peter Griffin vs. #12 Ninja Turtle Raphael

#2 Doug Funnie vs. #3 Ralph Wiggum

Max Power Region

#1 Homer Simpson vs. #4 Ninja Turtle Michelangelo

#3 Charlie Brown vs. #7 Pinky and the Brain

A.W.E.S.O.M.E.-O Region

#1 Eric Cartman vs. #5 Ninja Turtle Leonardo

#2 Darkwing Duck vs. #3 Glenn Quagmire

Sheera’s Piece Region

#4 Fred Flintstone vs. #8 Shredder

#2 Optimus Prime vs. #3 Zapp Brannigan

Again, the voting link is https://survey.vt.edu/survey/entry.jsp?id=1206985627599. Thanks to everyone for voting. I don’t think we’ve had as many hits on the site all last year as we’ve had votes in the 2nd round.