Archive for the ‘Dry Heave’ Category

Tech vs. Baylor… the aftermath

March 24, 2009

Warning: The following words are filled with slightly drunken hatred, poor English, and terrible rhymes.

You know, there aren’t many things I get up at 11 am on a Saturday to do. Skiing, tailgating, and the Preakness come to mind. Do you have any idea the effort it takes to get up to watch an NIT basketball game?

Since you’re reading this, I’m guessing you do. But apparently our basketball team does not. We can try to keep the swearing to a minimum from here on out, but no promises.


So let’s set the scene, shall we? Headed to a friend’s place for a barbecue. We told him we’d be there around 11 to watch the game. He went to the effort of setting up a second tv in the main room to watch the NCAA games when they came on. You know, for the people that care about that 2nd rate tournament.

It quickly became the most pathetic scene in the history of life. Two Hokies, sitting on the couch, watching that dry heave of a basketball game. People didn’t even make fun of us. They just felt sorry. I think we were down by 15 before we finished our first beer (which was quickly).


Look, we know Baylor isn’t terrible. But sweet lord of the extension cord, what the f** was that?!?! An 18 point loss at home in the post season. Thanks for the past four years, A.D. Sorry your going away party is so lame.

We have no idea where to start. I guess we can begin with a line from the write up:

An 18-3 run, capped by two A.D. Vassallo free throws, got the Hokies to within 65-52…

It took a 15 point swing to get within 13 points. Let that sink in a little bit.

So what was the problem? Scoring? Rebounding? Coaching? Hot dogs? We have no clue whatsoever. Our best guess is that Baylor hired some guys to take the Tech team on a bar crawl Friday night.

At least A.D. and Delaney are consistent. They both managed to make 4 of 17 from the field. I’m not saying my sister could make 4 shots in 17, but my sister could make 4 shots in 17.


So that’s it. It’s all over. We’ll recap the season later, but we had to get everything out on paper now. At least your humble editor gets to spend this week in Ocean City. In March. Oh wait…

Note: We realize every player on Tech could beat us in a game of horse, air hockey, and probably Wii Mario Kart. We were just kidding guys.