Archive for the ‘Becky "Icebox" O'Shea’ Category

Game 2: "Preview" and Predictions

September 5, 2008
Yeah, we would have done a full preview. But it’s a four day week. We’re still in our hole after Saturday. And it’s freaking Furman. Do you really want to read about what kind of team they have and what we need to do to beat them? Well, we hope not, because we sure as hell don’t want to write about it.

We found the helmet, and by gum we are going to use it.

Will play 11 guys at a time.
Has no mascot or discernable nickname. (Maybe the Furmen? Gross.)
Division 1-AA.

Why do we play this game? Thank the good lord the NCAA added another game to the schedule. Wouldn’t want to use that extra week for, you know, a playoff.

Here’s our idea for the game. Make it a practice for the coaches. Go in with no game plan. None. Then, at the end of each quarter, they have to… (insert scary music)… MAKE ADJUSTMENTS.

When was our last true come back win? We’re not sure there’s ever been one in Hokie history. In fact, we’re fairly certain the coaching staff plays Xbox at half time.


As far as the rest of the year goes, we are still in this. With Tyrod burning the shirt (whatevs) Tech is probably the favorites to win the NEAC… I mean the ACC.

Seriously, how pitiful is this conference? Vanderbilt could make an Orange Bowl over here.


Well, with our phoned in Furman preview out of the way, let’s get to the predictions:

Congrats (I guess) to last week’s “winner”, Wright. As Madjay pointed out, he correctly picked the VT score on the nose, and was the closest to the ECU score. Plus he’s the Notre Dame of the group, so he gets a few bonus points for no reason.

I’m sure he will celebrate this victory with great fanfare.

File Photo

(all VT wins, obviously)
Gally: 35 – 3, Tyrod pulls a Moxon and pegs Beamer in the face when we stop running the ball.
DiP: 31 – 3, two defensive scores
Carnegie Mellon’s Super-Scientific Football Analyst: 35 – 10
Maniak: 27 – 10
B-Dubs: 42 – 7
Meet the Summet: 34 – 13
The Bull: 31 – 10

(Feel free to drop your own prediction in the comments. We promise to not stalk Facebook to find a drinking picture of you.)
So now that Optimus Prime is in the ICU, it’s time to turn in a completely different direction. Our coaches performed so badly last week, they will have to swallow their pride and accept help from a girl that knows more about football than they do.
(No DiP, it’s not Sarah Palin.)
We need to get a team leader. Someone who knows what’s going on, especially on defense.
You guessed it. Becky “Ice Box” O’Shea.

Perhaps this year, just one time, we can beat Kevin down Cherry Tree Hill.


VT vs. Le Tigres

September 7, 2007

It has been 6 long years. 6 years since the LSU riot machine came to Blacksburg. We were but mere freshmen at the time… well, some of us were juniors, but we all graduated at the same time. That game was actually played on Sunday, and it was a classic.

But this time is a little different. The Hokies are no longer in the friendly confines of Lane. And it isn’t #16 vs. #14. These are two top ten teams playing in the hostile Death Valley. (Why are there two Death Valleys, neither of which are located in the actual Death Valley? And why so dark? They should have taken a page out of Penn State’s book and called it Happy Valley… nevermind, Death Valley is pretty badass.)

LSU is primed for a National Title run, and can lose a game and still have a legit chance. Tech has an outside shot, and this game is a must. And it will be anything but easy.
LSU is good. Real good. Their offense is a little weak, but their defense is incredible. They are better than us, and that’s a fact. The question is: can we be better than them for this one night? You know, Rick Moranis once beat Ed O’Neill down Cherry Tree Hill in Urbana. All it takes is one time.

Us poor folk won’t be going to the game. It’s a long flight, Baton Rouge kinda sucks, there will be 80,000 LSU fans, and there is a lot of good football on all day long. We’ll save the money to make ridonkulous donations to get season tickets in the future.

But why the hell does the game start so late? This isn’t San Diego State and it’s not on Fox Sports. This is ESPN having a 9:15 start? For arguably the biggest non-conference game of the year? This will make 2 game sin a row against LSU where snaps will take place on Sunday.
Anyways, on to the 10 weekend predictions:

1. I will laugh any time Lou Holtz says a word with an “s” in it and says “sh”. (i.e. defensh).
2. Penn State will beat Notre Dame by 20 and be scolded for scheduling such weak opponents so early in the season.
3. WVU will not look good against Marshall. They will win, and probably handily. But I think they will struggle surprisingly in the first half.
4. Troy will likewise frustrate Florida.
5. I will get into a 15 minute argument about whether or not Pam Ward is a dude.
6. South Florida will not score.

7. Duke will beat UVA (hopefully).

8. I will not move from the couch for 7 hours in a row.

9. Hawaii will score 62 points.

10. VT 13, LSU 10