Archive for February, 2007

Kyle and Kurt Busch. Brothers. Bike Cops.

February 23, 2007

For Lent, I have decided to give up not watching NASCAR. That’s right, my February resolution is to follow NASCAR this year. How has it been going?

The first race I watched ended with a .02 second difference between 1st and 2nd and a car crossing the finish line flipped over on fire. I was waiting for two of the drivers in the final wreck to get out of their cars and run to the finish line.

So as I take a look at CNNSI’s driver power rankings (with my guy Tony Stewart #2), I notice Kurt and Kyle Busch’s pictures. I knew they were brothers, but I had no idea who was older… until I saw the pictures (Kurt-right, Kyle-left):

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Gee, I wonder who could be the older one? Kurt looks like the frat guy that played intramural softball as if it was everything in world to him… because it probably was. Kyle looks like he’s 12. He’s more of the freshman at his first keg party. “Beer tastes awful.”

Here’s the question: Will Kurt eventually put his brother in a head lock and give him a noogie after Kyle passes him for a win? And what will Thanksgiving dinner be like: “Could you pass the green beans like I passed your ass in turn 3?”

At least we know grandpa still has it in him:

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Ron Rivera: You Just Got Served

February 21, 2007
Congratulations! You are the defensive coordinator for the Super Bowl runner-up. You coached the 3rd-best defense in the league, and were considered as a top canidate for four NFL head coaching positions. How did those opportunities turn out? Oh, you were demoted?

Who are you? You are Ron Rivera, part of America’s major-minority, and the NFL’s forgotten minority

Lost in the shuffle of the wonderful achievement of black coaches making it to the Super Bowl was the fact that our Hispanic friend Rivera was passed on 4 times for the top job in the NFL (Aside from the ref that marks the original line of scrimmage for a drive. Seriously, how is that a job?).

For a league and media so gung-ho for diversity, it is surprising that this was missed. Imagine an African American coach with Rivera’s credentials being demoted to linebacker coach for a guy named Norv. Bob Ley would have “Outside the Lines” fodder for weeks to come!

Apprently, diversity is news-worthy when it’s black and white. I realize there are not that many Hispanic players in the league, but if media folks are going to step up for one race, why not others? Not that ESPN has noticed the growing demographic of Latin Americans in the US (ESPN Deportes and Sal Paolantonio do not count).

My question is who will be the first one to apologize for an illegal immigrant joke pertaining to Rivera and his new team in San Diego? Maybe Jamal Anderson, the NFL equivalent of flash in the pan player Tim Hardaway (in playing, not in hating gay people).

In the next 50 years, are we to expect that there will be no growth in Hispanic, Asia, or Scandinavian players and possible coaches in the NFL? How far does the Rooney Rule go? Soon, each team will be required to interview one person for every continent.

Pittsburgh Penguins Own Your Soul

February 13, 2007
First off, I have to identify the writer of this article. It is I, C Gally. The Dip would like to have nothing to do with this article. (He is infact a Flyers fan. With the pain of this current season, I’ll just leave him be.) I am here to write about the best thing to happen to Pittsburgh sports since Ben Roethlesberger before Peyton Manning: The 2007 Pittsburgh Penguins.

But Corey, isn’t the hockey season 2006-2007?

You are correct. But I am only talking about the 2007 team. Since National Hung Over Day, the Pens are 13-2-3. So what do you make with the 2 and 3? 23, the average age of the starting forwards on the team. (Yeah, that was a stretch, but whatever.)

There isn’t much press about this for 2 reasons. One is that it’s hockey, and ESPN has decided against talking of such things. And two is the big move. Will the Penguins win the Stanley Cup in their last year in the city? More importantly, does that mean the city gets to keep the cup forever? So they have to come up with something new, like the Mike Lang Cup?

So now, at 4th in the Eastern Conference with the least number of games played of the top 8, the Pens are looking good to not only make the playoffs, but to succeed. With either a new stadium or a new town on the horizon, this season could make for the lasting memory of the Civic Arena (eff the Mellon crap). So what do you want? Playoff history? Or the movie Sudden Death

LET’S GO PENS!!

Deep Thoughts: Superbowl XLI

February 5, 2007

Even with my relatively minor interest in this year’s game, I thought I’d share the little tidbits of Superbowl XLI that made it worth watching for me.

  • From now on, any team that wins the toss in a championship game will elect to kick and let the other team run it back for a touchdown. At least Hester wasn’t injured by the celebration like Ted Ginn. Like Madden said, “There’s a rule: don’t score a touchdown if you can’t handle the celebration.” And yes, that was a “Replacements” reference.
  • I’m pretty sure that even with the multi-million dollar careers Peyton and Eli have, their older brother still picks on them.
  • What weighed in the balance of last night’s game? More Peyton “will he ever win the big one” or more Peyton “Come on down to Barrill Honda” commercials? I still can’t decide what would have been better.
  • Biggest dissappointment of the night: no cavemen commercials.
  • Biggest non-dissappoinment: Apparently working in Go-Daddy’s marketing department, in reality and not the commercial, invloves getting your $3 million dollar budget, making one commercial, putting the same one on twice during the Superbowl (thus spending your $3 million), then taking a nap until next January. Even in reality, that seems pretty sweet.
  • Peyton received the first ever Lifetime Superbowl MVP Award. Pedestrian stats are not those of an MVP, and Dominick Rhodes got hosed.
  • Rex Grossman fumbles more than Eddie Royal, and may actually be a worse quarterback than Sean Glennon… nah, I won’t go that far.
  • For the last freaking time: if a receiver is ruled as having been pushed out of bounds, YOU CANNOT REVIEW IT!!! I swear I am going to break a TV one day. You are broadcasting the freaking Superbowl! Quit asking where the review is.

So that’s pretty much it. Not that exciting. I actually enjoyed watching Fox broadcast the National Championship game about 10 times more. Who’s next on the “will they ever win the Superbowl” list? Here’s a sampling:

  • Bill Cowher… oh wait, nevermind!
  • Donovan McNabb
  • Tim Couch
  • Jay Cutler/Tony Romo
  • Brian Urlacher
  • Ricky Williams

Good luck all!

Bill Belichick: Bud Kilmer of the NFL

February 2, 2007

With the new story coming out about Pats linebacker Ted Johnson playing with a concussion (because Mr. Belichick told him to), some big similarities are being drawn between art and real-life (if the NFL is considered “real-life”).

That’s right, one Bill Belichick is acting more like 22-time District Champion Bud Kilmer from Varsity Blues. Check it out:
  • Two coaches with more success that any other in their respective leagues.
  • Both are considered untouchable by criticism from fans and media (except for hugs).
  • Now, in declining years, both are so desperate for a win they will push players further and ruin futures for their own selfish ways.
Ok, so the last one may be a stretch for Bill, but still. You really think Ted Bruschi “came back” from a stroke that quickly under his own free will? My Aunt had a stroke 5 years ago, and she won’t be anywhere near getting back on the Patriots for at least another 18 months. Other than those, let’s look at the other story lines:
  • One great, go-to QB gets injured, another steps in and takes his place with great success.
  • Tough, good running backs that get no where near the credit the QB’s do.
  • Whip-cream bikinis.
Now, I doubt any of the Patriots teachers are strippers, and I don’t think any own a pig, but it still works. Will there be a coup in the 2007 season? Will an injured Drew Bledsoe take over coaching duties? We’ll have to see. But unconfirmed reports have brought us the following quote from Ted Johnson to Belichick:

“I. Don’t want. Your life.”